Someone I know killed his/herself

This type of death is known as “suicide”. If someone in your life kills themselves, it can be very hard to understand why. You might be angry with them for doing what they did. These feelings can be very uncomfortable. It’s natural to have a lot of questions like:

• ’What did I do wrong?’
• ’How could they do it?’
• ’They didn’t want to be with me.’

You may feel you have been abandoned by them.

Everyone can feel it’s their fault and start blaming each other. This can lead to everyone feeling confused. A person who dies by suicide has an illness in their mind. For them, it seemed like it could not be made better. They might have wanted the pain to stop rather than to end their lives but in trying to stop the pain they hurt themselves in a way that could not be put right by anyone. It may be that when someone has decided to end their life, there is nothing we could have done to stop them.

There’s a booklet called ‘Beyond the rough rock’ produced by Winston’s Wish for families who have been bereaved through suicide.